The current mania to hybridise the names of members of a couple tends to be limited to celebrities. Some, like Wayleen (Wayne + Coleen) or Pecks (Posh + Becks), fail to take. Others do: look at Brangelina (Brad + Angelina) and TomKat (Tom + Kate). Not many dermatological afflictions are honoured with the same melding, but spotty shoulders is one of the few: back + acne = bacne.

Because of the prodigious number of sebaceous follicles on men’s backs compared with women’s, bacne is more often a male problem than a female one. And, as Jeffrey Archer may recall, even the intimation that your back is packing a pustule earns widespread ridicule: bacne is a byword for unsexy, viz one of Bret Easton Ellis’ callow protagonists in The Rules of Attraction: “Will you always ignore the smart, caring, sensitive type, who might be four foot three and have acne on his back but who is still, essentially, bright?” Answer: like, yesss.

But there are few problems that can’t be solved. Bacne is quite challenging, thanks mostly to inconvenient siting: it’s hard to see the problem to assess it and, once assessed, you have to be a contortionist to apply your chosen cure. Hence this rave review for Murad’s Clarifying Body Spray. Sure, it’s expensive (£26 from www.muraduk.com), but the ingredients are tried and tested and work. Best of all, it’s a spray, so easily applied without (a) dislocating a shoulder or (b) asking someone else to tend to your bacne. Not that I have bacne, of course. Oh no. Hahaha.

tokenmale@thetimes.co.uk